Golf jokes, golf humor and funny golf stories. A blog to show the humor in the game of golf.
A golfer is someone who’s just broken 80, and plays every chance he gets. A “golf widow” is a woman whose husband has posted his own score on the board before the rest of the foursome has finished 18 holes. A “gimme” is one inch of putt that all players allow their opponents, regardless of how close it is to the hole.
A “perfect shot” occurs when a golfer hits his ball into a water hazard and it lands in a fishing boat containing two fishermen who have been drinking beer all day. The fishermen promptly proceed to dump half their beer on each other, drop their rods overboard and then fall out of the boat while attempting to net the ball.
A “snowman” is what you see when you hit your drive off line so far that not even God can find it, or save you from your playing partners’ ridicule. And finally, “the 19th hole,” also known as “the clubhouse,” is where serious bettors settle up and losers buy drinks for everyone else in sight; essentially, the place where most golfers get into more trouble than they left
Golf is Not a Sport
Is golfing really a sport? I say, “No way!” Sure, it’s been around for hundreds of years. Sure, it’s easy to get hooked on it. And sure, millions of people play it. But even with all that going for it, golf is not a sport.
A sport has to be strenuous. It should make you sweat and get tired. It should mean something when you win or lose. The excitement of competition should keep you coming back for more. It should test your skill and courage in ways that require physical exertion and mental toughness.
When was the last time you heard of someone dying while playing golf? No one ever did — unless they had a heart attack or were hit in the head by a wayward ball (which happens far too often). No one ever broke a leg; no one ever got knocked out; no one ever lost teeth while playing golf; no one ever got stitches while playing golf; no one passed out from exhaustion while playing golf; no one twisted an ankle while playing golf; no one pulled muscles while playing golf … well, you get the idea.
Can you imagine Michael Jordan or Tiger Woods (or any other athlete) saying he (or she)
We take the game of golf way too seriously. Let’s face it, at the end of the day all we are doing is trying to get a little white ball into a hole. We have to be able to laugh at ourselves and the game we love.
We are going to keep this blog fun. We will post funny pictures, videos and jokes to put a smile on your face.
We know that golfers love their statistics so we will also keep track of how many visitors we get and what they are looking at.
We hope you enjoy the site and if you have anything you want to add please send it in via our contact us page.
Golf is not a sport, it’s a game. There are differences between sports and games.
A game is where you can have better equipment than your opponent and still lose.
A game is where the worst player gets to play twice as many shots as the best player.
A game is where your ability to read the greens is more important than how far you hit the ball.
A game is where, if you make a bad shot, you get to replay it, but at triple the original cost.
A game is where, if you make a bad swing, you can stop and take a practice swing without penalty.
A game is where if you are in trouble, there’s a good chance no one saw you do it.
A game is where you can hit a shot 20 feet from the cup and two putt for birdie.
In a sport, the best player usually wins; not so in a game – just look at professional golfers!
Golf Joke
Golf is a game in which one endeavors to control a ball with implements ill adapted for the purpose.
Golf is a game whose aim it is to hit a very small ball into an even smaller hole, with weapons singularly ill-designed for the purpose.
Golf is a game where you shout “fore,” shoot six, and write down five.
Golf is a game where the slow people in front of you are considered dangerous hazards and the fast people behind you are considered unacceptable nuisances.
Golf is a game where you can be most proud when you look your worst.
Golf is a game where you can be over par and still be ahead of everyone else.
Golf is a game where you drive as far as possible, shoot as low as possible and putt for dough.
Golf is a good walk spoiled by a little white ball.
Golf is an expensive way of playing marbles.
Golf is an outdoor art form practiced by animals who want to get indoors.